Yet Another 31 Nights of Halloween: The Stuff

The Stuff: Tasty
87mins – Comedy/Horror - 1985

Looking for a unique film for Halloween?
Here you go! Ladies and Gentlemen, The Stuff!

One of the best satires that’s really a horror film at heart. Michael Moriarty leads this delicious film of mysterious goo that is pouring out of the earth. For some odd reason an old man takes a taste right away to see what it is. This white thing pouring from the earth taste amazing. Corporate America takes a taste as well and what we get is this new craze sweeping the nation.
America buys it by the ton, replacing all other foods with this new food called... The Stuff!

“It's smooth and creamy. It’s low calorie and delicious. And it kills. It's The Stuff!”

Everyone becomes addicted to The Stuff that turns them all into zombie like creatures. Everyone must eat The Stuff! If you don’t soon they will make sure you do!


One night, a kid named Jason notices the new food, The Stuff moving in his fridge.  He tells his parents and they don’t believe him. They have already been taken over by The Stuff. He runs to the grocery store to warn the people but no one believes him. This creates a story that runs in the paper, which an ex-FBI agent, David Rutherford notices. Rutherford is played by the amazing and extremely tall (6’4”) Michael Moriarty.  Rutherford during this time is investigating The Stuff when the news about the boy comes his way. Along with Nicole (Mad Men like promoter), these three are the world’s last hope to pull them from this controlling goo.

Will they stop it or is the nation over as we know it?!

The story works and it works well. It feels like the body snatchers, the blob and a comedy about America’s consumerism all rolled up into one. It’s a very unique film that is just a flat out great film. Yes acting is rough and the effects are of their time. But there is so much more here then a horror film, but a satire about this country and its need to consume the latest greatest fad. It feels like it could happen and honestly isn’t that far fetched of an idea, even thou it might seem extremely absurd. I could see this working today maybe with food or medication. An evil corporation finds something that they want to make a ton of money on, so they bribe the FDA and get their product into everyone's hands even if it has deadly side effects. As I watch this I see a commercial for a pill that can kill you. The side effects out weigh the job of the pill, so why is this available then?

See it's not too far out!

The look of The Stuff is great. I love the design of package in this film. Strips of pink, light purple and brown circle the pint container creates an iconic movie prop.

Please watch this film. It’s an intriguing film that balances comedy in the right way. Yes its funny that a food could take people over but I find it even more funny that the need for consumerism is sadly the realest part of the film.

Side Notes:

On Netflix as of now, no reason to not watch this!

Garrett Morris (SNL) pops up and he is fantastic onscreen. Originally Arsenio Hall was considered.  
To create The Stuff, a lot of Häagen Däzs ice-cream and yogurt was used.

Yummmmy

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Yet Another 31 Nights of Halloween: Go to the Head of the Class (Amazing Stories TV Show - S2:E8)

Okay so I’m going to try something a little different here. In the late 80’s, Steven Spielberg came out with a TV show called Amazing Stories that seems to ether grab a ton of flack or a ton of love. I never really watched the show, maybe a totally of two episodes of which I couldn’t tell you a damn thing about. I do remember the show and that opening but not a bit of memory regarding the episodes. So since Amazing Stories is on Netflix, I’m going to pick a couple of episodes out of order strictly do to the crew and actors that appear in that episode.

Go to the Head of the Class: Enjoyable

Season 2, Episode 8 (November 21 1986) 60 mins

The reason why I picked Go to the Head of the Class was because of the involvement of Christopher Lloyd as Professor B.O. Beanes, Bob Gale (teleplay), Alan Silvestri (Music) and Robert Zemeckis (Directing). Yes the majority of those who worked on my favorite movie of all-time, Back to the Future.

Right off from the start this has the Zemeckis look. The opening is classic Zemeckis just like Back to the Future, it tells a lot about the character. We start off on the TV that slowly comes out showing our main character’s room filled with pictures of a girl. We start to pan down from a window with a basketball and baseball bat, band posters, stickers, a phone going off and a clock. Our main character (Peter Brand) picks up the phone to find a screaming mother yelling at him about being late for school.

Cut to a shot of Peter Brand jumping out the window running to school, its so McFly like and that is just too damn awesome. 

The next scene is where Christopher Lloyd comes into the story. He plays a teacher who is pretty hard on his students. Seeing a student crewing gum, he questions the student who quickly swallows the evidence. The Professor then picks a piece of gum from under the desk of the student, ask what is this then? The student says thats not the kind I chew, which in a silly way catches the student in a lie. So he requires the student to swallow the random piece of gum. I love this scene a lot because Brand is trying to sneak into the classroom during this time. The way the whole scene flows just reminds me of Back to the Future, which isn’t a bad thing mind you. Alan Silvestri scores this episode just like Back to the Future. When Peter falls into the grave around the 18:20 mark, just listen, it just screams Back to the Future and damn do I loved that. 

Regarding the story it’s definitely not the strongest but still enjoyable to watch. It’s a revenge plot after Brand and his best friend; Cynthia Simpson (Mary Stuart Masterson) gets caught with the same paper. Brand takes the blame and is punished in front of the class by the Professor. So the two decide to cast a deadly spell on the Professor which doesn’t go to plan. I really enjoyed this episode mostly because it felt so Back to the Future like. That said Go to the Head of the Class was still enjoyable to watch especially with Halloween around the corner.

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Sizzling Bacon

HYPNOTIZING

Sizzling Bacon - Hypnotizing

There are many days where I think to myself, "I have 20 minutes of excess time; what should I do with myself?"  Well, today was my lucky day.  Deciding to log into Netflix for a moment I noticed on the homepage...."Sizzling Bacon."  Hmmmm, I figured, "why not" and strapped myself in for 20 minutes of the most hypnotizing bacon cooking in recent memory.

*Of course, and before I get into this "review" this is Netflix April Fool's prank, so stay with me on this one*

So, "Sizzling Bacon," how do I explain this one.  As per Netflix "Sizzling Bacon" is "The boundaries of TV and time go up in smoke with this tasteful, "Memento"-style puzzle that takes the viewer out of the fire and into the frying pan." You had me at "Memento."

Wathcing "Bacon" was quite the experience.  Normally at home I'm only able to cook bacon from beginning to end.  In 20 minutes I was able to experience how bacon should really be cook; from end to beginning in a sexy cast iron skillet.  Like I said, hypnotizing.

Hopefully this is a turn for Netflix, who I'm sure is trying to corner to backwards food cooking demographic that it so desperately needs in order to rule the world. If "Sizzling Bacon" is any indication, I don't think there is anyway to stop them now.  What's next; "Smoking Sausage," "Baking Bananas" "Broiling Bratwurst" "Grilling Steaks." One can only hope....

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The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: August Edition

Hello boils and ghouls.  Okay, this isn't the Cryptkeeper, and it's nearly three months away from Halloween, but I couldn't help myself.  But what I can offer you is The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for the month of August (and some of June and July, we had a lot to catch up on in this edition).

After an extended hiatus the boys are back (of course this is Matt speaking in the 3rd person) and maybe not better then ever, but at least their adequate.  This month they jump into the "Ben Affleck as Batman" debate head first, share their shame in everyone's favorite segment, "Simply Ashamed," talk some "Breaking Bad," celebrate the filmography of Sinbad, and campaign for the best film coming this Fall.

Be sure to check the show notes below for more fun and hijinks.

Show Notes:

What Makes Breaking Bad so good?
SlaughterFilm
Cinema and Suds
Fall Movie Preview

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Click HERE to listen to podcast

Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest

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Nature Calls

Nature Calls: Ouch

79 min  -  Comedy (?)  -  2012

So one night a friend and I went on Netflix looking for a film to watch. You know, late night snacking with a “funny” movie playing, drinking beers and pissing the night away. When we finished watching this film we both could not help but wonder why we watched the whole damn thing. It’s such a crappy film, I think we both were in a shocked state of mind.

Polar-opposite brothers Randy and Kirk never saw eye-to-eye, but their rivalry is taken to a new level when Randy hijacks Kirk's son's sleepover, taking the boys on a Scout Trip to remember. (IMDB)

So why does this film suck so much?

It’s a comedy film that has maybe 12 seconds of funny in it. Out of the 79mins only 12 seconds is funny? Well I’m not sure how that can be counted as a comedy film.

I mean, Schindler’s List was funnier…

With a cast like Nature Calls I think I’m angrier that it’s as bad as it is.

Patton Oswalt, Johnny Knoxville, Rob Riggie, Darrell Hammond and Patrice O’Neal (his last film).

And this film still sucks? I like the story, the actors but the script just wasn’t ready and maybe could have been worked on by its awesome cast.

If you come across it one night, Skip it.

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